Blondes are not stupid

[blade]

Julie, the blonde, was getting pretty desperate for
money. She decided to go to the nicer, richer
neighborhoods around town and look for odd jobs
as a handy woman.

The first house she came to, a man answered the
door and told Julie,"Yeah, I have a job for you.
How would you like to paint the porch?"

"Sure that sounds great!" said Julie.

"Well, how much do you want me to pay you?"
asked the man.

"Is fifty bucks all right?" Julie asked.

"Yeah, great. You'll find the paint and ladders
you'll need in the garage."

The man went back into his house to his wife who
had been listening.

"Fifty bucks! Does she know the porch goes all the
way around the house?" asked the wife.

"Well, she must, she was standing right on it!" her
husband replied.

About 45 minutes later, Julie knocked on the door.
"I'm all finished," she told the surprised
homeowner.

The man was amazed. "You painted the whole
porch?"

"Yeah," Julie replied, "I even had some paint left,
so I put on two coats!"

The man reached into his wallet to pay Julie.

"Oh, and by the way," said Julie:

"That's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

_______________________________________________________

The executive was interviewing a young blonde
for a position in his company. He wanted to find
out something about her personality so he asked,
"If you could have a conversation with someone,
living or dead, who would it be?"

The blonde carefully considered the question and
then finally answered:

"The living one!"

[MK888]

Blonde goes in to see a doctor.
Doctor: I have some good news for you miss, you are pregnant!!!
Blonde: are you sure it is mine?

[Slugbait]

Two blondes are walking thru the woods one day when they come across a set of tracks.

The first blonde sez "Look...bear tracks!"

The second blonde sez "Those aren't bear tracks. They're deer tracks!"

They were still arguing when the train hit them.

[bitSLAP]

Haha okay. Blondes: please only take these jokes for their comedic value.


There is a real estate agent showing a house to some potential buyers. He gives them a tour of the house and then they start discussing buying terms. After talking for five minutes or so, the agent yells out the window, "Green side up!". They continue talking and five minutes later he yells again out the window, "GREEN SIDE UP!!!". He does this a few times and finally they ask him why the heck he keeps yelling out the window. He replied, "Oh, well I have a blonde laying turf down"

[Lafnazazn]

what is the difference between a blond and a misquito? After you slap them, only one of them stop sucking.

[Reg Kmet]

hahaha, love the first one blade

[nitro237]

A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons.
"I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of
you will buy me a drink." The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and wrapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised. The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks were delivered. The man
stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try". A hush fell over the crowd.
After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A blonde woman timidly spoke up. "I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle".