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I have a Delta Black Label 7200rpm/38cfm cpu fan that I'll give ( free and I pay shipping ) to the person who best describes how they would torture that evil, scumbag, POS, Oosama bin-Laden, were they able to capture him.

Judges are Nexus_7, Kakarot and me ( Da vidman! ) . Points will be awarded on creativity, malice and gore! (1-10 scale in each category. So Come on now! let's get the tickworm and rough him up !! :|

<b> UPDATE: Contest Results are in, Here are your WINNERS !!</b>

<b>Winner is Executioner</b> The cherry bomb in between the fingers and toes clinched it .
<b>2nd Place is Hypnotic Trance
<b>3rd Place is Ketchup ( submission #2) </b>

I've decided to award prizes to all 3 of you, so PM me with your addresses and I'll get back to you to tell you what you've won.

This should be fun

Cattle prod up his a$$
Twigs and berries in a vise
Remove his eye lids so he can't close his eyes
Peel about an inch of skin every day starting with his feet, do this with a blow torch
remove his fingernails with a pair of pliars
Pull his teeth to make room for the cow pies we will fill his mouth with
Use a sledge hammer for random bone breaking
When all this is done dump him on a street in New York and let the masses do with him as they please

I would put him in a cage, and tour the U.S.A, and let everyone get 1 punch at him.

Strip him naked and cover him with a pig skin complete with the pigs head still attached.(I hear this prevents a visit to "Allah") Keep him standing and do not allow him to go to sleep for three days. Parade him through Manhattan and allow a few citizens to take a "throw" at him. Force him to appologize to the US first and then the whole world. Show him videos of his "troops" fleeing across the border. Build a huge microwave that requires every survivor and relatives of victims to start with everyone pushing their own personal "start" button, skin him alive, soak him with jet fuel, place him in the microwave and count down from 10 to 0.(You know what happens at 0) Make sure microwave is set on "low" for 2 hours. Send his remains to an Iowa pig farm for disposal.

ahhhhhhhh yes my little droogies ! keep them coming ! Contest will run thru SUN nite in order that your imaginations can run WILD !!

GET the SAND booger of slime !!

Don't forget that in his "religion" ( cough, cough) it's unholy to eat pork. I'd be holdin' that POS down with one hand and stuffin' his scrawny mug with some greasy bacon until he gagged while I shaved that scruffy beard of his with a chainsaw with the other hand and that's just for starters.

too bad I ant elgible for the prize.

Send him to an all-female university to major in the history of Christianity. After he graduates, strap him to the business end of a JDAM and drop his ass on Sadam Hussein.

May not win but very simple...

Strap the MOFO to a bed.....stick a curling iron up his ass...turn it on high heat and leave..


the the ultimate demise....SEX WITH ROSEY O'DONALD!!!!

Throw him in a steel cage with Mike Tyson. Televise it. Enough said.

a Delta Black Label 7200rpm/38cfm cpu fan that I'll give

I'd almost pay you to NOT send me that jet engine sounding fan!

hmm, but if i win I could add yours to the one I have and then my case will be able to fly around with me wherever I go.

hmmm, better yet we could place it on bin laden so that we we'd always know where he's at. After all we'd hear him 3000 miles away!

ok ok, what shall we do with mr. balless. He doesn't deserve a quick death. Have him tied naked upside down to a tree which is near a fire ant colony, pour honey all over him and in all his orifices. Video tape all the ants attacking and slowly eating him. Maybe regular ants would be better though because it'd take them longer to finally kill him. This would be fine and educational programming for the discovery channel too.

Of course we record his agonizing yells for mercy and play them over and over to the remaining taleban and his supporters as we bomb them.

Mikey likes it :B

Killing him will only create a martyr. Holding him prisoner will inspire his
comrades to take hostages to demand his release. Therefore, I suggest we do
neither. Let the Special Forces, Seals or whatever covertly capture him, fly
him to an undisclosed hospital and have surgeons quickly perform a complete
sex change operation. Then we return her to Afghanistan to live as a woman
under the Taliban...

Since I'm the "Executioner", this should be a piece of cake:

1. He is first strapped to a cross.
2. Each person is allowed to pull one beard hair from his face, while in front of him, are Playboy centerfolds showing all, and playing rock-n-roll music.
3. After the beard has been removed, then we begin by removing each finger and toenail.
4. We then place cherry bombs between his toes and fingers, slowly blowing off each member.
5. After the toes and fingers are gone, we then coat one arm in gasoline and ignite it.
6. We repeat step 5 to the other arm.
7. We have a small jar of killer bees that we strap on his crouch.
8. With his legs remaining, we use 2 4x4 monster trucks on opposite ends that rip them off (trucks have American flags waving).
9. We then place gerbils in his anis, while he's lectured about the joys of homsexual activity.
10. And finally, (my favorite part), his head is removed using a big axe like they did 1000 years ago.

Well i'm sure the torture would use the delta fan in one way or another. I'd make him listen to it until his ears bled then I'd slowly chop him to bits with it a piece at a time, i've heard horror stories about those deltas

get one box cutter, place one cut for every person that has been wronged by this coward, dump him in a pool of boiling alcohol to represent the fuel used to drive those planes into those buildings. Place him in a room full of speakers so loud that he couldnt hear himself scream listening to endless cries from those who have lost someone in that horrible tragedy. This would occur for two hours, once a month, on the 11th, for life on live television.

EXECUTIONER .........Dewd !!

I think ur in the lead with that one !! Have to consult the other judges tho. You've done the "Executioner" handle PROUD !! I especially like the beez on the ballz number ! OUCH ! that hurts just thinkin' about it.

Ketchup, you aint' far back either ! I like the extended nature of your program but I think it could take place a bit more frequently. :lol

I would put slightly deep cuts on every single square inch of his body, tie him up, throw him in a vat of salt and swig him around for several hours then I would do like how the Pageans did to their enemies (I think it was them)- push his torso through several pieces of wood, being careful not to puncture or damage vital organs so he doesn't die soon, then let him hang 25 feet on the Statue of Liberty and let him feel the pain for several days until he dies.

Good enough?

Edit: Whoops, someone won. Oh well, it's still here for the world to see.