"Anybody can sleep with a pretty girl...."
They're ALL pretty if you've had too much to drink.
Reasons Why Beer is Better then Religion
No one will kill you for not drinking beer.
Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
Beer has never caused a major war.
Beer is useful when you're down
Beer has been helping ugly people get laid for ages
If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.
When you have Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second Beer.
Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured for his brand of Beer.
There are laws saying Beer labels can't lie to you.
You can prove you have a Beer.
Beer is useful: You can drink it.
A beer, drunk properly, is a social winner.
You can switch your brand of beer whenever you want without losing beer-drinking friends.
Beer helps you enjoy life, religion reminds you how shitty people are.
Beer is a social lubricant, religion is a social inhabitant
Beer was instrumental in the formation of the American constitution. All but one of the people who signed the original constitution were brewers - the other was a malter.
